So. I have a blog.
It finally has a name. It might not be it's final name but I am satisfied enough with it that hopefully I can stop devoting battery depleting brain cells to search for it; cease gnawing that mental dog bone I have used as a stumbling block to actually writing something. No, I did not listen to the advice of either of my advisers who told me to just write first and find it later. I can be resistant to logic.
Upon further review, this may well be harder than I originally thought. Isn't that true with most projects for me? When the transition from imagination to action occurs? Objects always may be closer, bigger, scarier, harder than they originally appear your mental mirror.
Perhaps I should introduce myself? That seems like a reasonably predictable place to start. I am a 53 year old mother of three sons. They are my life's greatest work. I have been married to the same wonderful man for almost 34 years. I recently became a grandmother to a precious baby boy, one of my most satisfying promotions of all time! I am a sister, both by blood and by marriage..I don't sweat the details of such. I am an aunt and a daughter-in-law. Most unfortunately, I am also an orphan. That is a condition that happened much sooner than I could have ever imagined and well before I was prepared.
*Excuse me for just a second. My inner child is whining about not having anything relevant or important to say. I am going to have to ask her to pipe down. She lacks confidence!
How on earth do I find myself here? Honestly, I started a blog once before. It was titled Forty Ninth Year. It's intent was to prepare me for that major milestone birthday...the big golden one. I was going to get all my 'stuff' situated for that second half a hundred. Weeeell, life grabbed me by the scruff of the neck and kicked my butt for a while. A lot of 'stuff' happened. Fast forward. I had no proper hanger for that original account information and it all fell on the floor of my mental closet. Hopelessly buried. So I am starting anew!
I am still trying to get my 'stuff' together. In fact, in the interest of full disclosure, I have been trying the majority of my adult life to get my 'stuff' together. I am a remedial student of organization. Chronically so. However, in a pure display of our Heavenly Father's sense of humor, I am ever an optimist. Some day I firmly believe I will live long enough to get that new leaf turned over!
I saw a friend post the hypothetical question of giving up Facebook for Lent. I recoiled and thought to myself 'Oh, NO WAY!!!!' said a little too quick and way too emphatically. I argued and extolled the good points...and there are some! Though I had to admit that it was taking up an embarrassingly large chunk of my life: time, energy and focus. It had way too much power over me. Power to affect my time, my mood. Yes, some good but yes. A lot that was NOT good as well. I do also appreciate a challenge, especially my being a rather weak person at times. I can 'get into a zone' with some things and can be really good at 'course staying' when I want to be. This is always a good thing to remind one's self of! I knew many would believe I could not. I do enjoy proving a point. There are no real losers in this one.
I have heard the howls of some who say they miss me. They may just be choosing to be kind and polite. :-) I do miss talking, whether anyone is being honest about enjoying it or not. So I thought I would perhaps find an alternate way to honor that. Hopefully it will allow me a more controlled reentry to the world of Facebook when that time reappears.
I think we all crave and strive for balance, in all aspects of our lives. Balance is a wonderful and ever more challenging thing! Balance seems to get harder as you go along; physically and mentally. I hope to make this a space where I share some of that journey.
